


another day

by akikaji (botanicalskeleton)



Category: Given (Anime), Given (Manga)
Genre: Christmas, M/M, slight angst ?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:28:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21978097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/botanicalskeleton/pseuds/akikaji
Summary: It's Mafuyu's second Christmas without Yuki.
Relationships: Satou Mafuyu/Uenoyama Ritsuka, Satou Mafuyu/Yoshida Yuuki
Comments: 2
Kudos: 93
Collections: Given Nation Secret Santa 2019





	another day

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Viozeven](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viozeven/gifts).



> Vio! Sorry this is late, but I hope you enjoy it!

Mafuyu walked into the studio holding a box of decorations that Haruki sent him after. Akihiko was laying on the floor beside his drum set and Uenoyama was sitting on the floor with his guitar. He had his headphones connected and was strumming away quietly at the new song they were working on. Ue was taking forever on his part, but Haruki wanted them to be together as they worked on it. So while Uenoyama was busy doing that, Haruki decided he wanted to decorate for the holidays.

Akihiko had been staying with him since Ugetsu kicked him out, so he made Aki bring the decorations over. Mafuyu gave Haruki the box and went back to his small spot in the corner of the studio. He sat with his knees to his chest and his head staring down. No one noticed him, and he was happy about that.

Mafuyu hated the holidays. While he had a new family to spend those days with, he hated it. There was just something that he couldn’t escape and he wished he could. His mind would run with these thoughts and he wasn’t sure how to make them stop. But he never did. He couldn’t express it, there were no words he could say that would describe how he was feeling. He was getting better at it, though. Ever since the live show, he started showing a bit more and more emotion, but he still couldn’t show much. He felt himself on the brink of a breakdown though. It was coming and he knew that.

It all broke down to the fact that he missed Yuki. He missed him _so, so_ much. There wasn’t a day that Yuki wasn’t on his mind. It was worse around this time. The two spent so much time together and had little traditions together. But it was all gone now. It was his second Christmas without Yuki and it wasn’t as easy as it was the first year. It was harder somehow.

No one knew though what was inside his head. Hell, Mafuyu didn’t know sometimes what was going on in his mind. He looked up to see Haruki setting up a small tree in the corner. All of them agreed to get gifts for each other, and Mafuyu had been saving up for it. But he hadn’t boughten anything for anyone in over a year. He didn’t know if he could.

Haruki hummed to himself as he tried to put lights up around the tree. Akihiko watched him and laughed as Haruki nearly fell over. More so, he nearly tripped over his own two feet. He looked over and glared at Aki. Haruki looked at Mafuyu, watching him put his head back down, and sighed quietly to himself. They were all used to him being so shut down at times, so he didn’t think much of it. All he could do was offer to take him outside and get him a drink and hope it would help.

“Hey, Mafuyu,” Haruki said, and Mafuyu hesitantly looked back up, “Come on, help me get drinks and snacks.”

“Oh.. okay,” he mumbled. Haruki was heading out and Mafuyu reluctantly got up to follow him.

Uenoyama looked up and took his headphones off. “Where are you going?” He asked as they walked out the door. Neither answered Ue, and he shrugged slightly.

Akihiko tossed a drumstick at him and he groaned and glared at him. “Back to the song.”

Outside no cars were passing surprisingly. Haruki muttered a quiet thank god under his breath and walked to the vending machine. Mafuyu followed him but kept his head down. Haruki got himself a coffee, and Mafuyu a tea. Handing it to him, Mafuyu took it, not looking up.

“Mafuyu, what’s going on? Haruki asked. He took Mafuyu to a different part of the building where they would be alone and out of the cold. Mafuyu kept his head down and said nothing. He could feel himself on the verge of tears and he didn’t want to cry in front of anyone. The last time he almost cried was on stage when he looked at Uenoyama. “I can’t help if you don’t talk to me.”

Haruki’s eyes widen slightly as he heard Mafuyu start to cry. In all the time he’s known Mafuyu he’s rarely shown emotion. But here he was crying in front of him.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Haruki pulled him close and wrapped his arms around him.

Mafuyu kept crying and buried his face in Haru’s chest. He rubbed the smaller boy’s back gently and rocked him back and forth. This was the first, the first proper time, that Mafuyu had cried over Yuki’s death. Haruki wasn’t sure what to do other than hold him. The only other real time Mafuyu showed emotion in front of them was when his strings broke before the live show. Even then that was only because he and Uenoyama started to fight a bit.

It felt nice to finally cry. Mafuyu had been holding so much inside of him for so long and he didn’t know how to let it out. He was carrying the weight of the death of the person who mattered the most to him in the world. He was trying his best with the band and Ue, but everything was hard. Trying to fight and blow his way through what he was feeling was tearing him apart inside.

Haruki held Mafuyu until he calmed down. He couldn’t tell anyone if it had been five seconds or five minutes, maybe even ten. It didn’t matter. Haruki knew that something was wrong and no one ever pushed him about it. Especially after he sang at the live show. That unlocked something deep inside of Mafuyu and they knew that. Granted they all knew that Uenoyama was exactly fond of hearing a song about his past love.

Haruki sat Mafuyu down on the bench and sat on the floor in front of him. He figured it would better for him to talk to him, knowing that Mafuyu was looking at him. He noticed the boy’s eyes were bloodshot, which was to be expected.

“Mafuyu,” Haruki said keeping his voice quiet and calming, “What’s going on?”

Mafuyu sat silent for a little bit. Haruki not saying another word to him. He knew it was better to let Mafuyu speak on his terms rather than force him to.

“I miss him…” He whispered. His voice was so quiet that Haruki barely caught what he said. _Him_? Was it the one he sang about? “It... it’s my second Christmas without him.”

Haruki nodded and grabbed Mafuyu’s hand and ran his thumb back and forth on it. It was a comfort thing that he knew some people liked so hopefully, it would help him as well.

Mafuyu started to talk and Haruki sat and listened. All Mafuyu could do was talk and talk. Mafuyu told Haruki how he and Yuki, every year, would go for hot chocolate and to see a movie. Then that night they would decorate a tiny Christmas tree in Mafuyu’s room. It wasn’t much but it was their little tradition.

“He… We did everything together… he- He was by my s- side as we decorated the tree.” Mafuyu muttered, “Now he’s gone. I don’t... I don’t know what to do.”

Tears were in Mafuyu’s eyes again and Haruki sadly smiled at him.

“You can’t change the past, unfortunately, Mafuyu, but you can always move forward,” Haruki told him. “It’s not easy, especially if he was such a big part of your life.”

“I don- don’t want to forget him,” Mafuyu looked Haruki in the eyes. Haruki could see the pain in his eyes. It was bluntly obvious.

Haruki moved and sat beside him and wrapped his arm around him. “If something, or someone, means enough to you, you’ll never forget them.” He rubbed Mafuyu’s back. “It’s not the same I know, but now you have me, Aki and Ue, who you can create these moments with. While still remembering him.”

After a little bit longer of a heart to heart talk, Mafuyu and Haruki went back to the studio. Aki was sitting with Uenoyama now, helping him.

His head turned quickly and he got up. “Where the hell did you two disappear to?” Akihiko said, “You started to have me worried.”

Mafuyu mumbles a small _sorry_ and Haruki assured him it was okay. Akihiko looked at Mafuyu and his expression softened. Uenoyama finished writing down what he was doing and looked over. He climbed to his feet and went and hugged Mafuyu, who buried his face in his chest.

Haruki pulled Aki to the side and briefly told him what happened, but not to bring it up.

“How much shit has this kid been through?” Akihiko asked and Haruki shrugged his shoulders. He looked over to Ue talking to Mafuyu and showing him the song melody they had down. Mafuyu had a slight smile crack on his face.

Haruki walked over and chuckled. “Well, the studio isn’t gonna decorate itself is it?” Akihiko had gone and sat against the wall. He watched for a bit but then closed his eyes.

Mafuyu smiled slightly and nodded. He helped Haruki put the lights on the tree and then the tinsel. Uenoyama and Akihiko messed around, not being much help. Which resulted in Haruki putting tinsel on his drum set and not letting him take it off. He sneakily, while they weren’t paying attention, hung mistletoe above where Ue and Mafuyu were standing together.

Going back over to the box, Mafuyu dug through it and found a little microphone ornament and his face lit up. Haruki noticed and smiled as Mafuyu hung it on the tree and clapped. Uenoyama decided to finally help and started to put the decals up on the wall. They were just generally winter and Christmas themed. It was helping to bring the holiday spirit to the studio. They’d be spending a lot of time there soon, so why not make it feel festive.

Haruki started to decorate Akihiko in tinsel, as he fell asleep sitting against the wall. Akihiko was still asleep and would be for a while knowing him and his odd sleep patterns. So why not make him a bit festive? The two younger boys couldn’t help but laugh quietly. Uenoyama snaked his arm around Mafuyu’s waist and pulled him close. Neither had bothered to notice that Haruki had placed the mistletoe above them.

Haruki laughed at them, still amused at the fact that they hadn’t noticed it.

“What’s so funny?” Ue asked.

Haruki was fixing his hair and tied it back up in a bun quickly. “Sometime’s the answer is right above you.” He told them and shook his head, “Anyways, I’m gonna have sushi delivered and get drinks.” The two watched Haruki rush out again before they could ask him any sort of questions.

“Right above you,” Mafuyu mumbled, repeating what Haruki had just said. He looked up and finally saw the mistletoe. “Uenoyama.”

“Huh?”

Mafuyu pointed up and Ue saw it. He laughed slightly and shook his head. “Of course he did that.”

Mafuyu leaned up and kissed him. Uenoyama’s lips were soft and felt like home. But they were so foreign. He still was reminded of Yuki every time. Though he was starting to come to terms with Ue. It was a new love, and maybe Yuki would forgive him one day.

Uenoyama wrapped his arms around Mafuyu and kissed him again. He smiled slightly before laying his head on Ue. There was so much to fight to move on from. On the one hand, Haruki was right. He could still move on and not forget Yuki.

_I’m sorry, Yuki_ , he thought. _I love someone new_.

Mafuyu laid his head back on Uenoyama’s chest and closed his eyes. Haruki looked over and smiled sadly at the two, knowing what was running through his mind. But he knew that Mafuyu would be okay. One day.


End file.
